7 Ways to Calm Your Mind and Get Control of Your Finances

Over spend, being frugal, being cheap, binge buying, splurge, careless spending.

I was watching Til Debt Do Us Part on Slice TV..

This is the show description:
Taking Charge
Melinda¡¯s obsessed with image. She buys what she wants, and when husband Brent doesn¡¯t make a consistent income in his freelance job, she makes him give up the career he loves in favour of something steadier. Now, Melinda¡¯s on maternity leave for the second time, and unless she gets her spending under control, the family is headed for disaster. Gail challenges Brent to take charge for the first time ¨C and neither Brent nor Melinda are very happy about it.

As I watch this show, I realize that there are thousands of people having the same issues. Where as I would love to sit and criticize the people show cased on Til Debt Do Us Part, I've also been guilty of overspending without giving it much thought.

Ways to calm your mind and your spending

1. Realize that you've got a problem.
   If you're fighting with your spouse about money, or you're stressing about your own spending, it's time to sit down and think about your problem.
   Think specifically about what's causing your money arguments. Is your spouse out of control with spending and/or are you out of control with your spending?
   
   
2. Get into a quiet space and write down your finances
   Go into a quiet place for an hour and start to write down your finances. Write down how much you make and how much you spend. Make an income vs expense statement.
   
   If your house is too noisy and there are too many distractions, go to a local coffee shop or library where there are no distractions. You need to be able to concentrate fully on your finances for 1-2 hours.
   
   The biggest problem that I've seen with myself and others is getting too busy and not taking the time to think about in house spending.
   
   Much of the time when I was overspending, I was way too busy and in denial. At the time I was over spending, my dad described it as us spilling money. He said, "you spill more money than I make". I had to agree with him, but at the time didn't do anything about it because I was immersed in building my business.
   
   
3. Accept that you're too busy
   If you're overspending, and you're over busy, you have to get less "over busy".
   
   If you've ever said, I'm too busy to do a financial analysis for myself, then plainly you're too busy. If you're truly interested in working out of your own financial crisis, then you need to re-prioritize your schedule and spend time working on your financial structure.
   
   You may need to stop some of your activities ( if only temporarily ) and give yourself time to organize your finances. This is a hard thing to do. Especially when you're busy with kids activities, hobbies etc.
   
   Giving yourself time to concentrate on your finances will automatically start the process going forward.
   
   
4. Structured financial counseling may help
   It's difficult to seriously accept the fact that you're over spending if you're still too busy and still not able to give yourself the time to internalize that you've got a problem.
   
   If you are a busy person it may take a while for you to accept the fact that you're overspending. The beauty of a program such as Til Debt Do Us Part is that the couple is required to concentrate on their finances. The cast are required to do exercises in order to get them in touch with their financial lives.
   
   Getting financial counseling may be the answer for the rest of us.
   
   In the past, I've sat with a counsellor and talked about issues from marriage, to business, to finances etc. I found it extremely helpful to get out of my busy life for an hour or two and have a discussion about that day's topic. It stopped all of the outside noise and gave me the time to concentrate on the topic at hand.
   
   This may be a way for you to guarantee yourself a way to focus on your finances, if for only an hour or two a month.
   
   In the episode of Til Debt Do Us Part that I watched; as soon as Melinda took some time to talk to Gail Vaz-Oxlade, the counsellor, she immediately realized that she had a problem and started to work on it right away. Sometimes that's all it takes.
   
   Gail Vaz-Oxlade said, "If you keep spending this way, you'll increase your debt by $34,000 in 6 months, and $500,000 in 5 years."
   
   An experienced financial counsellor is able to analyze your situation and explain your future if you continue on the same path.
   
   
5. Develop a new plan for your finances.
   This requires you to go to your quiet place again. You need to take the time in a quiet place to develop your new financial plan.
   
   
   Points to consider
   
   • How much money do I need for my highest priority debts?
     
   • How much money do I need for my highest priority expenses?
     
   • How much should I save up to develop financial reserves?
     
   • What items are things that I can do without?
   
   
   It's pretty simple to figure out your finances.
   List your highest priority debts and expenses first, and then if you have money left over, start planning your savings. ( Yes... Savings!! )
   
   
6. Give yourself time to get in touch with your finances.
   If you're in financial turmoil, you're probably also in emotional turmoil. These are difficult things to deal with and will take time.
   
   My point is, if you've got money problems, give yourself permission to take enough time over the coming months to get back into control.
   
   Stop which ever activities you need to in order to have the proper time to work on your finances. This process may take a few months to work itself out. If getting in control of your finances is a high enough property, you'll have to spend several hours working it out. And... as you run into snags and questions, you'll have to take time to work those out as well.
   
   Give yourself permission to take what ever time is needed to work on your finances. ( I've learned this the hard way over the years. )
   
   
7. Start working your new plan -NOW!!
   Let's be reasonable about it.. it's going to take time to get this new way of financial thinking into effect. The important thing is to start now.
   If you don't start concentrating on your finances now, you'll just prolong the problem. I don't care if I'm making you feel guilty, if money is causing you problems , you need to be thinking about it now.
   
   Finally, getting started now doesn't mean you have to fix all of your finances now. It just means you have to commit to starting the process now.
   
   Start today to get in a quiet place and think about your money.